Wake Up Call

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Good morning, from a 7:30am East Coast train! 

It’s been a while since my last blog – my Stone Mountain post was a month and a half ago? I almost forgot I even had it and I’m sure some readers may have forgotten it existed as well; though
I did spend a few minutes skimming through my older posts and can only wish I wrote better English… (A ten year old probably has better grammar skills than I do.)

So what have I been doing? What are the excuses for my online hiatus? Nothing very interesting for public reading, but quite scary and exciting for me. I’ve been sorting out my future, like choosing a university course, leaving school and other important things. (And also I’ve started Jazz dancing! But more on that later.)

Oh, the time it took my silly brain to think matters over, taking into account my personal statement, choice of universities and admissions tests. As I look back – I’m talking as if this happened a hundred years back, but really it was a week ago – I chew on a banal cereal bar which I bought from the train, and wonder if it was really necessary to fuss over it so much? 

For curious folks, here were my five UCAS choices:

  • Oxford
  • London School of Economics and Political Science
  • King’s College London
  • Warwick
  • Glasgow
  • Wow, seeing it written out above makes me look even more ambitious and makes the likelihood of getting an offer seem further away from my grasp. Well, no harm in aiming high. 

    Okay, I’ve written enough about this. It’s over! On a final note I have a piece of advice, for anyone applying next year, on personal statements: show it to as many people as you can because they will point out so many places which require refinement, but even if they completely hate it, stick to what you think is right for you. Every person’s page is their own; if yours exhibits a similar type of content to everyone else’s, you really won’t stand out. For example, I sent mine to the TheStudentRoom and the comments I received both frightened and disheartened me. This was partly because they typed their criticism in bold red font; I really believe seeing this colour instils some form of rage in me. In the end, I did change a little bit to give a better impression. I just wish they didn’t use red font.

    Once again I blog whilst journeying away from home. I am off to London! This is because I have my NYO audition tomorrow afternoon. My violin practice has strangely decreased as we came closer to the audition day. Last night, I practised for an hour before I got tired of hearing myself. Ha, I can hear people saying:
    ‘But that’s a good thing isn’t it? You must be very prepared and confident!’
    …the answer is no. I’ll see how I feel tomorrow.

    I am quite settled into my final year at school. My timetable is breathing with more blank spaces and fewer classes. The work is harder but manageable. One of the duties of a senior is to be an example to younger students – am I meant to be a role model now? I still feel like I have so much to learn and I feel uncomfortable with the idea of younger people looking up to me.

    I look up to myself sometimes and I wonder why I do the things I do. Why don’t I sleep better? Why can’t I get things done? Why am I an observer instead of a proactive individual? Why do I think too much to be able to do things efficiently? For example, it can take me over an hour sometimes to complete a light hearted blog post and even then I sometimes go back to amend a few unsatisfactory areas.

    Why do I make a mess when I eat anything?!
     
    Anyway, I’ll brighten the mood with a new ‘hobby’ of mine. I discovered that I become quite attentive when hearing people argue (if I am not directly involved). It’s not a legitimate hobby or an activity which normally brings people enjoyment, but as always I am not afraid to admit to (some of) my peculiar habits. The arguments I hear are from a selective group of people of course. I noticed that the reason neither side can come to an agreement is because they are too proud to stand down or notice their flaws. I hear phrases like:

    “Yes, but you’ve not been trained or taught to do that.”

    “You treat me like a child.”

    “You don’t listen to my advice.” 

    “My experience tells me better…”

    Oh, those phrases are almost unbearable to read.

    I sometimes see this pride in myself too. However, I tend not to fight back, because it’s really not worth it. I leave the disputes to the grown-up children. 

    Anyway, there ends the first post of my final school year. Have a good day. 

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    2 thoughts on “Wake Up Call

    1. I suffered from the red mist over the red pen in times past, when a pedantic boss scrawled on my script in red ink, and then when it was retyped, he would scrawl over it again – sometimes putting back things he’d deleted…grr

      • In my teachers comments I was lucky to see the softer markings from a pencil instead of red ink. I’ve never had to make so many changes to such a small piece of text!

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